Frank Beamer keeps telling us that we have two great quarterbacks this year. While I would love nothing more than to believe him, I haven�t seen greatness from either of them in a while. Well this is the best possible Saturday in which to turn things around. I don�t know of anyone who is fond of BC, and I more than most do not like them, due to the fact that I live in Boston, and am sick and tired of those Trust Fund Fredo�s. Let�s end their stint in the Big East without a bowl bid and get us one step closer to Jacksonville. It�s time for Bryan and Marcus to shine, and frankly I see them putting on a show this weekend.

In celebration of our last Big East game I thought I would compare our old home with our new home, so I scribbled notes about the WVU/Pitt game last Saturday. I did the same for the UVA/Maryland game, and I thought it might be interesting to compare the two scribbles. The end result is that I truly believe we are heading to a much easier conference.

Maryland/UVA:

• It�s 34 degrees at Byrd Stadium and I am doing my first ACC scribbles. Why? Well, why not? We are playing Temple this weekend, and so I have to do something.

• In the pre-game interview, Al Groh said that this game was like the "Redskins v. the Cowboys (I have to assume that makes him Spurrier), the Giants v. New England. It�s North East football." Really, NE football? I live in the northeast Al, and I can�t remember the last time I saw your little Hoos travel past Maryland. Geography major were �ya?

• Wait just a second. Al mentioned the 1) Skins 2) Cowboys 3) Giants and 4) Pats in his interview. If I am not mistaken � and I�m pretty sure I�m not � that interview added 4 years of pro experience to his resume. Not too shabby, Al.

• OK what�s with Testudo? Sounds like some place you don�t want to get kicked.

• Funny, I just saw Maryland run that fake reverse, hand-off up the middle play that we seem to love so much. Didn�t quite work as well without KJ, though.

• Hey here�s a question, are we ever going to use that play to set up an actual reverse? Just an idea. What do I know?

• I started this scribble with the intention of actually writing a scouting report of sorts but frankly, neither team is really holding my interest enough to constitute all of this work. I feel like I am watching paint grow. I mean grass dry.

• Hey that Under Armor house protection commercial is on now and honestly, it�s growing on me. I find myself actually answering the guy. "I will! I will!"

• OK Maryland did like nothing on that drive, so it is now Schaub�s turn to showcase his Heisman abilities. I seriously chuckled out loud when I typed that. It is pretty funny � read it again � Schaub, Heisman. Hah.

• They do have some wind there tonight, so this might not be Schaub�s best showing. They don�t count the windy games in his stats, do they? No? OK good. I want to be fair.

• I would love to do a serious analysis on this game, but frankly I can�t hold a candle to Will�s analysis columns. I�ve never been serious in my life, and this chick Barb Pelan (I am at her house for a dinner party of sorts right now) keeps feeding me whiskey sours. I�m two drinks from slurring my notes (can that be done � can one slur notes?) and the Special Turtles are driving.

• I can�t help but wonder how we could possibly lose to either of these teams (Keep in mind that I wrote this before our fantastic Temple showing).

• 2^nd quarter with 4:40 left, and there is another wind factor stat. I�m not kidding. Is this just something they do for Schaub? I�ve never seen this before.

• You will have to forgive me. Since I�m at a dinner party, dinner is included. So I was eating it, with one eye on the television and the other on the pork and scalloped potatoes that are now floating in my whiskey-filled stomach. I seem to have missed the entire second quarter. Does it really matter though, this is a 5-4 and 6-3 team. Sure Barb, I�ll have another � cheers.

• Hey, Trev and Mark are going over Heisman candidates at halftime. OK we have three QBs, a RB from Michigan, and Larry Fitz. Where�s KJ? Did they not watch the Pitt game?

• OK so I�ve now missed the entire 3^rd quarter, but it seems nothing much has happened. Let me tell you why. First of all, I have more whiskey than blood flowing threw my system (to prove this, look at the way I spelled through. No joke I actually scribbled it that way). These drinks really are amazing � I�m working on getting the recipe for you now. Anyway, so I�m saying goodbye at halftime so that I can make it home in time for the start of the 3^rd, and their freakin� [indoor] cat runs out the door and up a tree. Now follow my thought process here and remember my state of mind at this point. Do I: A) say my goodbyes and head home (I�m not the driver) to catch the super exciting second half, or B) help our gracious hosts get their ladder and climb the tree after Moby the cat . . . ? So I�m up on top of this ladder (told you I would be the one on the ladder when I retold this story, Keith), the winds are gusting like Schaub�s worst nightmare . . . I know, I�m surprised I hung on, too. I grab Moby and make my descent, hand over the cat, and head home. Now I ask you, should I have had to risk life, limb, and a wind too strong for football-throwing (have I beaten the wind thing to death yet?) to miss the 3^rd quarter of what can only be described as the most exciting game of the year, just because these people got me drunk and fed me? (Wow that is quite a sentence.) Who cares? The tree thing was more exciting than the game, anyway.

• One thing that I have to point out here: it is the 4^th quarter of a pretty close game and I can�t hear a thing from the crowd. Not a thing. These people will not know what in the hell hit them when they step foot in Lane.

• OK there�s 3:42 left in the 4^th. UVA�s down by 10 and they have 80 yards to go. Let�s see what the Cavs are made of.

• 1^st down � Schaub scrambles left and throws the ball away.

• 2^nd down � in the middle of Herbstreit�s Schaub love-fest speech, he gets sacked.

• 3^rd down and 18 � Schaub drops back and lets loose a phenomenal incompletion. Hey, it looked good in the air.

• 4^th down � they punt. Groh is quite the play caller. Well done.

• Speaking of Groh, do you see him standing there in his all-orange outfit like he just broke out of Lorton or something?

• Maryland wins. The Cavs got kicked right in the Testudos.

• By the way, I�m not sure at what point this was said but at some point an announcer exclaimed "Schaub throws underneath � what else is new!" You can�t make this up. Funniest thing I heard all night.

• This was followed by "I like toys. Show me your toys, Kirk." I have no idea what in the hell this means, but in my state of mind, I was rolling after that one.

• And of course Lee Corso chimed in with the usual "UVA is one of the best young football teams this year. Look out for them next year," comment. Keep saying it every year Lee, and eventually you�ll be right. Even the fat kid kicks a home run once in awhile.

Now compare those scribbles to the following from the WVU/Pitt game, and let me know which conference you think is better.

• We are halfway threw the first and the score is 7-7.

• This is the battle of the two teams that are supposedly better than we are.

• I am totally sober tonight and yet I still spelled through (above) incorrectly. What does that mean? I�m just retarded.

• Hey, West Virginia has increased security and installed collapsible goal posts for tonight�s game. They have also instituted a plan in which each week they designate one storefront in Morgantown to be looted, burned, and destroyed in the name of college football. This way, they hope to make it through an entire season and still have couches left to burn during basketball season.

• I�ve got to tell you, I think West Virginia wins this game.

• I don�t even know who to root for. Which outcome helps us the most? Does it matter? Frankly, after our showing against Temple, I don�t care.

• One huge difference between our old conference and our new home � everything�s loud in the Big East all the time.

• Wow, Marshall to Henry for 40-some yards, WVU goes up by 3. They�ve got the run game that Pitt doesn�t and that should give them the edge. (Should have given us the edge too!)

• Evidently the Eers' game plan involves not covering Fitzgerald at all. He is having a monstrous first half.

• I apologize, I have to flip to the FSU/NC State overtime game.

• Doak Campbell stadium, in overtime with the Wolfpack driving, and all I hear is that FSU band. I hate the fact that their band will be in our stadium. I hate that (expletive) chant.

• Hey just saw a Fitzgerald highlight � another amazing TD catch. He is running rampant.

• OK FSU only needs a field goal to win this now so if they lose, they suck.

• Back to WVU and Pitt. I am finding it very difficult to actually care about this game but I did find some Formula 1 movie with Stallone and Gina Gershon. Does she get naked? She gets naked in like, every movie . . . now I have to watch.

• Stallone is driving. He�s driving some more. Some 12-year-old kid is his racing partner and he is now driving. No Gina in the last 15 minutes of this thing. Who directed this?

• Crap, now The Negotiator is on TNT. I have to force myself to watch this game.

• By the way, we have the Terror Dome, Penn State has Happy Valley, I think Michigan is called the Big House, so it is only fair that WVU have "The Sofa." Can you picture it? "Folks it�s a great night here at The Sofa. Real football weather tonight. And have we got a couch burner for you."

• God I am so happy that I don�t live in Morgantown.

• With 13:24 left in the 2^nd Pitt pulls a Miami. #8 just dropped the ball on an easy long TD pass.

• I�m not sure why, but WVU�s noseguard lines up literally right over the ball every single play like he�s making a pass at Pitt�s center. Kind of makes me uncomfortable.

• Have you seen this "I Spy" movie with Eddie Murphy and Owen Wilson? It�s on HBO now and the scene where Eddie Murphy talks to the president, G.W., on the phone is hilarious. Fine, fine, back to the game. Wait, is that the "Beastmaster" (Marc Singer) as Carlos the pony-tailed spy? Nah . . . is it?

• And we�re back to the backyard snore.

• OK Owen Wilson might be the most underrated funny guy ever. Can we please get to halftime so I don�t have to keep flipping back and forth?

• Alright so Wilson (Quincy not Owen) is over 100 yds. with 9 minutes to go in the first half. I would take a great running game over a great receiver anyday.

• Hey Pitt just got another TD. How did we lose to either of these teams? Neither has any defense whatsoever.

• Flipping back, Wilson (Owen not Quincy) has now surpassed Adam Sandler as the funniest guy ever. It is really a question of what have you done for me lately, Adam?

• Oh hey, by the way, at the end of the half, Fitzgerald was completely upstaged by Pennington, #86 for WVU. What a freakin� catch.

• Finally halftime, 24-24. Absolutely no D for either team. Wilt would be impressed with all of this scoring. It�s like Spurrier v. Spurrier � like BYU playing itself.

• How funny. "I Spy" just ended so I flip back to the score-a-thon and the Mormon face-off has turned into a turnover war.

• TD BYU. BYU leads it 30-24 over BYU.

• Suddenly Pitt looks like Rutgers. It�s the all-WVU show here at The Sofa.

• What does this mean for us? What if the Eers win? How does this play out? So if WVU beats Pitt and Miami beats Pitt then Miami wins the Big East and the Gator Bowl will take us over WVU � correct? Where does this leave BYU? I am so confused. It�s like the first (and second time) I watched that scene in the Matrix Reloaded. You know the one � what in the hell is going on?

• Thank God the game is finally over. 52-31. Unbelievable. How did we lose to Pitt? Howwwwwwwwwww?

• At least we beat Temple although, as my father put it, at most that counts as half a win. And, well, he�s right. But a W is a W, and that is what we need to take home with us this Saturday. Fredo does not have a shot against us in Lane and unlike Luca Brasi, they�ll see it coming, right at them

TechSideline Pass Home