Wide Right: Bitten by the Pack
by Jeff Cockey, 9/27/04

Today is truly the first time that I dislike my column name. Brandon buddy . . . two of them . . . both Wide Right? Really? Shake it off, friend. You are a hell of a kicker and we will need you again, in the clutch, down the road. I guarantee that. So I scribbled down notes for this game and it would have made for a hell of a column if not for the outcome. But let’s take a look at the highlights shall we?

It’s the first quarter and T.A. Mclendon is running all over us. Whoops. OK. Maybe some of our highlights.

How about Vincent Fuller with his freakin’ awesome interception? How about that? The kid with an over the shoulder pluck catches it five yards deep in the end zone (which by the way is painted – sort-of) and decides that he has the berries to run it out past the twenty. Really? I think we all should have been consulted on that decision Vinnie. Turns out Fuller had a little “trickeration” up his sleeve. This is not a freakin’ word folks. I know this because it’s always caught by my spell check. Although, sportscasters feel the need to use it on a daily basis these days, so I guess we are throwing Webster out the window. What happened to “trickery?” Might that word work in this situation? Anywho, so Fuller and my boy E. Green had a little pow-wow before the game and decided that a well timed lateral as Vinnie got tattooed, would bring the crowd to its feet. And more or less, it worked like a charm. I don’t know what you guys think, but that stunt was wicked ridiculous. Unbelievable. That type of play is totally nuts, simply because if it didn’t work and something went wrong, Beamer would’ve been on them like white on rice. But luckily for everyone involved it hit on all cylinders and the Hokies were set to roll. I am thinking ESPN plays of the week here. Maybe not top of the list, but definitely way above honorable mention.

Speaking of ESPN plays of the week, how about Duane Brown, with Baryshnikov moves that would make Carrie Bradshaw (Sex and the City) weak in the knees. The boy was seriously on his game. Brown treated us to a play worthy of Tivo. Watch that one again folks and then send me the tape for my viewing pleasure. Holy Crap! Tiptoe through the tulips baby, way to keep those feet inbounds. Two of the greatest plays so far this year and both in the same drive. You’re spoilin’ us folks.

And isn’t it oh-so-good to have Mike Imoh back? The kid is simply tough to tackle. He’s lubricant. The boy’s slippery. Breakin’ tackles, cuttin’ back, reversing runs, sliding through pile-ups. Sorry Humes but I think you’ve lost your job. Take it for the team though, Cedric, because if we weren’t facing an NC State team that has cultivated an absolutely ferocious defense from hell, Imoh would have put some major points on the board. He ain’t no Suggs or Jones but he sure as hell can be if he keeps his nose clean. Imoh was a definite bright spot in this ACC playground.

Another rack on which to hang our hat was the play of one Bryan Randall. The kid has really come into his own. Without “the second-coming” breathing down his neck and with an additional year under his belt B. Rand is mopping up. His legs are making it happen and his arm is looking strong. When NC State seemingly shut us down offensively (which pretty much describes the first three-quarters) Randall took control. Albeit in the fourth. We had three major drives that led to field goals, one of them leading to a shot at the big prize. I am highly impressed at his level of maturity. This kid graduated college in three years and is currently working on his graduate degree. Add that to his basketball and football responsibilities and you’ve got Superman behind center. You know that kid that ruins the curve for everyone in his class by acing the test? That’s Randall. ‘Cept that Randall doesn’t ruin the curve in class, but in life. He’s impressive. All right, enough of this Randall love fest. The guy is good and is showing it week after week. Think he’ll go pro? It’d be nice to see him on Sunday. Maybe head to head against MV.

The problem that I had with this game is not that we lost. It’s not the way we played the game. Although I would like to know why it took us until the fourth quarter to figure out how to drive on the Pack’s defense. It’s not that Chuck Amato has the fashion sense of a rodeo clown. It’s these down to the wire, pull out my hair, and stomp on my boys, games. They’re killing me. First against USC, now against NC State. I’m excited, scared, nervous, anxious, on-edge. I’m in a glass case of emotion. People say that’s what college football is all about. I say that’s how every other game should be. You know the games with teams I am not emotionally attached to – say Lincoln Tech v. ITT Tech. Let those be close and interesting to watch. When it comes to our games, give me a blowout. Bring it early. Punch ‘em right in the baby-maker. As an aside, that’s the second Anchorman quote I’ve used this column. Doesn’t get any better than Ron Burgundy.

So while the scoreboard said the bad guys won, I am pretty happy, for the most part, with our play. And who knows, it sounds like they got Miyagi to do that hand-clap thing on the X-man’s biceps. We might get him back a little earlier than originally thought. But hey, it’s not like we lost to Duke. Things ain’t that bad.

All right those of you filled with useless knowledge. While none of the following is condoned by TSL, Virginia Tech, anything to do with the Hokies . . . disclosure, disclosure, disclosure, yada . . . yada . . . yada . . . chew on this one . . .

“Think about it Josh, you’re in college. The window of opportunity to drink and
do drugs and take advantage of young girls is getting smaller by the day.”

As always questions, comments, and insults are always welcome . . .

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